Phileo – What does the Bible say?
Brotherly love - (Gives and Takes) The reciprocal love between friends who care
Definition: Phileo means close friendship or brotherly love in Greek.
Phileo and other forms of this Greek noun are found throughout the New Testament. Christians are frequently exhorted to love their fellow Christians:
Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honour.
(Romans 12:10 ESV)
"phileo ...to love; to be friendly to one... to delight, long for a thing, to be desirous of preserving one's life....
Phileo is to be distinguished from agape in this, that phileo more nearly represents tender affection. The two words are used for the love of the Father for the Son, John 3:35 (No 1)
35 The Father loves the Son and has given all things into his hand.
and 5:20 (No 2) for the believer
20 For the Father loves the Son and shows him all that he himself is doing. And greater works than these will he show him, so that you may marvel.
14:21 (No 1)
21 Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.”
and 16:27 (No 2)
27 When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world.
both of Christ's love for a certain disciple, 13:23 (No 1)
23 One of his disciples, whom Jesus loved, was reclining at table close to Jesus,
and 20:2 (No 2).
2 So she ran and went to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved, and said to them, “They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we do not know where they have laid him.”
Yet the distinction between the two verbs remains, and they are never used indiscriminately in the same passage; if each is used with reference to the same objects, as just mentioned, each word retains its distinctive and essential character.
Phileo is never used in a command to men to love God; it is, however, used as a warning in 1 Cor 16:22;
22 If anyone has no love for the Lord, let him be accursed. Our Lord, come!
The use of phileo in Peter's answers and the Lord's third question, conveys the thought of cherishing the Object above all else, of manifesting an affection characterised by constancy, from the motive of the highest veneration.
To love (phileo) life, from an undue desire to preserve it, forgetful of the real object of living, meets with the Lord's reproof, John 12:25.
25 Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.
On the contrary, to love life (agape) as used in 1 Pet 3:10,
10 For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit;
is to cultivate the true interests of living. Here the word phileo would be quite inappropriate.
'Phileo' is a love which consists of the glow of the heart kindled by the perception of that in the object which affords us pleasure. It is the response of the human [soul] to what appeals to it as pleasurable... The word was used to speak of a friendly affection. It is a love called out of one in response to a feeling of pleasure or delight which one experiences from an apprehension of qualities in another that furnish such pleasure or delight.
God requires that one Phileo love Him first and foremost above all to be worthy of Him otherwise there will be consequences
a)([Matt 10:37):
"Anyone who loves [phileo] his father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me; anyone who loves [phileo] his son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me"
Notice that there is no command in the NT for the believer to phileo love God. Nevertheless, 'anyone who 'phileo' loves his father or mother more than Him is not worthy of God.' Although phileo is a voluntary emotional response, it nevertheless is an essential one to have toward God above phileo love for all others in order to be worthy of God.
b) (1 Cor 16:22):
"If anyone does not love [phileo] the Lord--a curse be on him. Come, O Lord!
God rebukes and disciples those he Phileo loves
a) (Rev 3:19):
"Those whom I love [phileo] I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest, and repent."
Note that God so loved [egapesen = agape] the world that He gave His one and only Son. But God loves [phileo] His children, i.e., those who believed in the name of His Son, (Jn 1:12-3) and it is those whom he rebukes and disciplines.
Misplaced Phileo love can lead to the Lords’s reproof and een condemnation to hell
a) (John 12:25):
"The man who loves [phileo] his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life."
"To love (phileo) life, from an undue desire to preserve it, forgetful of the real object of living, meets with the Lord's reproof"
b) (Rev 22:14-15):
(v. 14) "Blessed are those who wash their robes, they they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city.
(v. 15) Outside are thee dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves [phileo] and practices falsehood."
c) (Matt 23:5-7):
(v. 5) "Everything they do is done for men to see: They make their phylacteries wide and the tassels on their garments long;
(v. 6) they love [phileo] the place of honour at banquets and the most important seats in the synagogues;
(v. 7) they love to be greeted in the marketplaces and to have men call them 'Rabbi.' "
a) (Rev 3:19):
"Those whom I love [phileo] I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest, and repent."
Note that God so loved [egapesen = agape] the world that He gave His one and only Son. But God loves [phileo] His children, i.e., those who believed in the name of His Son, (Jn 1:12-3) and it is those whom he rebukes and disciplines.
Misplaced Phileo love can lead to the Lords’s reproof and een condemnation to hell
a) (John 12:25):
"The man who loves [phileo] his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life."
"To love (phileo) life, from an undue desire to preserve it, forgetful of the real object of living, meets with the Lord's reproof"
b) (Rev 22:14-15):
(v. 14) "Blessed are those who wash their robes, they they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city.
(v. 15) Outside are thee dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves [phileo] and practices falsehood."
c) (Matt 23:5-7):
(v. 5) "Everything they do is done for men to see: They make their phylacteries wide and the tassels on their garments long;
(v. 6) they love [phileo] the place of honour at banquets and the most important seats in the synagogues;
(v. 7) they love to be greeted in the marketplaces and to have men call them 'Rabbi.' "
Notice that neglecting the love [agape] of God is neglecting what God has commanded relative to seeking the welfare of others instead of benefiting oneself, (John 14:15, 21). Hence the Pharisees not only loved [agape] the most important seats but also loved [phileo] the most important seats,
(Matt 23:5-7), neglecting the love [agape] and the love [phileo] of God.
God expresses Phileo love for the Son
a) (John 5:20]:
"For the Father loves [phileo] the Son and shows him all he does. Yes, to your amazement he will show him even greater things than these."
Jesus has a special Phileo love for certain individuals
a) (John 20:2):
'''So she came running to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one Jesus loved [phileo], and said, "They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we don't know where they have put Him!" '''
b)(John 11:3-5, 36)
(v. 3) '''So the sisters sent word to Jesus, "Lord, the one you love [phileo] is sick."
(v. 4) When he heard this, Jesus said, "This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God's glory so that God's Son may be glorified through it."
(v. 5) Jesus loved [agape] Martha and her sister and Lazarus.'''
(v. 32) '''When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died."
(v. 33) When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. (v. 34) "Where have you laid him?" he asked. "Come and see, Lord," they replied.
(v. 35) Jesus wept.
(v. 36) Then the Jews said, "See how he loved [phileo] him!"
Believers are to Agape love one another without hypocrisy, aborring evil, clining to the good as well as Phileo love one another warmly and affectionately
a) (Rom 12:9-10):
(v. 9) "Let love [agape] be without hypocrisy. Abhorring the evil, clinging to the good.
(v. 10) With brotherly love [phileo] for one another warmly affectionate, in honour preferring one another, not lagging in diligence, glowing [boiling] in spirit serving the Lord."
Note that v. 10 is in participle verb form, and not in imperative mood, hence one is not commanded to phileo love another here.
Notice that agape love involves a deliberate effort to love without hypocrisy, abhor evil and cling to the good; and the phileo brotherly love involves warmth & affection. So there is apparently a distinction made here between agape and phileo love.
Phileo love requires training
a) (Titus 2:4):
"Then they can train the younger women to love [phileo] their husbands and children"
Although phileo love is a voluntary emotional, affectionate type of response, one must train oneself and/or be trained to place oneself in an attitude such that that response is enabled. Hence the expression that one grows to phileo love another as opposed to immediately respond in agape love out of duty and self-sacrifice.
Phileo love is commanded of believers for one another
a) (Heb 13:1):
"Keep on loving each other as brothers [phileo]."
"brotherly love let remain"
God’s Phileo love as well as His Agape love resulted in His mercy toprovid salvation for mankind through His Son Jesus Christ
a) (Titus 3:4-5):
(v. 4) "But when the kindness and love [phileo] of God our Savior appeared,
(v. 5) He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy."
God saved mankind not only out of agape love, (Jn 3:16) but also out of phileo love.
b) [Compare Jn 3:16]:
""For God so loved [agape] the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."
Scripture References (phileo)
The Pharisees, who loved money, heard all this and were sneering at Jesus. (Luke 16:14)
The next day we landed at Sidon; and Julius, in kindness to Paul, allowed him to go to his friends so they might provide for his needs. (Acts 27:3)
The islanders showed us unusual kindness. They built a fire and welcomed us all because it was raining and cold. (Acts 28:2)
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honour one another above yourselves. (Romans 12:10)
Now about brotherly love we do not need to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love each other. (1 Thessalonians 4:9)
For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. (1 Timothy 6:10)
Their teaching will spread like gangrene. Among them are Hymenaeus and Philetus, (2 Timothy 2:17)
People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, (2 Timothy 3:2)
treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God-- (2 Timothy 3:4)
Rather he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined. (Titus 1:8)
Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, (Titus 2:4)
But when the kindness and love of God our Saviour appeared, (Titus 3:4)
Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, To Philemon our dear friend and fellow worker, (Philemon 1:1)
Keep on loving each other as brothers. (Hebrews 13:1)
Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart. (1 Peter 1:22)
Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. (1 Peter 3:8)
Greet one another with a kiss of love. Peace to all of you who are in Christ. (1 Peter 5:14)
and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. (2 Peter 1:7)
(Matt 23:5-7), neglecting the love [agape] and the love [phileo] of God.
God expresses Phileo love for the Son
a) (John 5:20]:
"For the Father loves [phileo] the Son and shows him all he does. Yes, to your amazement he will show him even greater things than these."
Jesus has a special Phileo love for certain individuals
a) (John 20:2):
'''So she came running to Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one Jesus loved [phileo], and said, "They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we don't know where they have put Him!" '''
b)(John 11:3-5, 36)
(v. 3) '''So the sisters sent word to Jesus, "Lord, the one you love [phileo] is sick."
(v. 4) When he heard this, Jesus said, "This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God's glory so that God's Son may be glorified through it."
(v. 5) Jesus loved [agape] Martha and her sister and Lazarus.'''
(v. 32) '''When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died."
(v. 33) When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. (v. 34) "Where have you laid him?" he asked. "Come and see, Lord," they replied.
(v. 35) Jesus wept.
(v. 36) Then the Jews said, "See how he loved [phileo] him!"
Believers are to Agape love one another without hypocrisy, aborring evil, clining to the good as well as Phileo love one another warmly and affectionately
a) (Rom 12:9-10):
(v. 9) "Let love [agape] be without hypocrisy. Abhorring the evil, clinging to the good.
(v. 10) With brotherly love [phileo] for one another warmly affectionate, in honour preferring one another, not lagging in diligence, glowing [boiling] in spirit serving the Lord."
Note that v. 10 is in participle verb form, and not in imperative mood, hence one is not commanded to phileo love another here.
Notice that agape love involves a deliberate effort to love without hypocrisy, abhor evil and cling to the good; and the phileo brotherly love involves warmth & affection. So there is apparently a distinction made here between agape and phileo love.
Phileo love requires training
a) (Titus 2:4):
"Then they can train the younger women to love [phileo] their husbands and children"
Although phileo love is a voluntary emotional, affectionate type of response, one must train oneself and/or be trained to place oneself in an attitude such that that response is enabled. Hence the expression that one grows to phileo love another as opposed to immediately respond in agape love out of duty and self-sacrifice.
Phileo love is commanded of believers for one another
a) (Heb 13:1):
"Keep on loving each other as brothers [phileo]."
"brotherly love let remain"
God’s Phileo love as well as His Agape love resulted in His mercy toprovid salvation for mankind through His Son Jesus Christ
a) (Titus 3:4-5):
(v. 4) "But when the kindness and love [phileo] of God our Savior appeared,
(v. 5) He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy."
God saved mankind not only out of agape love, (Jn 3:16) but also out of phileo love.
b) [Compare Jn 3:16]:
""For God so loved [agape] the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."
Scripture References (phileo)
The Pharisees, who loved money, heard all this and were sneering at Jesus. (Luke 16:14)
The next day we landed at Sidon; and Julius, in kindness to Paul, allowed him to go to his friends so they might provide for his needs. (Acts 27:3)
The islanders showed us unusual kindness. They built a fire and welcomed us all because it was raining and cold. (Acts 28:2)
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honour one another above yourselves. (Romans 12:10)
Now about brotherly love we do not need to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love each other. (1 Thessalonians 4:9)
For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. (1 Timothy 6:10)
Their teaching will spread like gangrene. Among them are Hymenaeus and Philetus, (2 Timothy 2:17)
People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, (2 Timothy 3:2)
treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God-- (2 Timothy 3:4)
Rather he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined. (Titus 1:8)
Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, (Titus 2:4)
But when the kindness and love of God our Saviour appeared, (Titus 3:4)
Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, To Philemon our dear friend and fellow worker, (Philemon 1:1)
Keep on loving each other as brothers. (Hebrews 13:1)
Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart. (1 Peter 1:22)
Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. (1 Peter 3:8)
Greet one another with a kiss of love. Peace to all of you who are in Christ. (1 Peter 5:14)
and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. (2 Peter 1:7)
